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Let’s explore how to get out a feeling of disconnectedness from life and superficiality in conversations. Here are some thoughts on connecting and conscious conversation in relationships. How to reconnect If you’re feeling disconnected, it is because you’re in a state...

If you are your authentic self, you have no competition. Be real in relationships.. Others respond to your being passionate about your life. It feels good to be around people who really enjoy who they are and life and express themselves freely. Be exactly what you...

Boundaries in relationships are crucial for their success. They are difficult to stick to because they seem selfish and yet they are the cornerstone of authentic connection. I love humanity by letting it be what it wants to be, I love myself by becoming that which I...

Although your relationships are crucial to your well-being and growth, there are times you may need to retreat a little and touch others lightly. Erase personal history To make major changes to your life, it may be necessary to 'erase personal history' (in American...

A relationship is an opportunity to see your reflection. Relationship places you outside of yourself so that you can see yourself. Let’s explore the relationship mirror. It is important in relationships to know what others see in you. They will cultivate what they see...

As long as the Ego runs your life, your thoughts, emotions, and actions arise from desire and fear. In relationship, you then either want or fear something from the other. All suffering is born of desire. True love is never frustrated. What can be frustrated is the...

When it comes to Self and relationships, Neale Donald Walsh sums it up nicely: The purpose of relationship is to decide what part of yourself you'd like to see 'show up', not what part of another you can capture or hold Relationship is not about having another to...

Ken Wilber speaks of a journey back to Self from 'cart and horse' to 'centaur' to 'unity consciousness'. This is a journey of re-integration, a coming home to wholeness. You are pure being - awareness - bliss. To realize that, is the end of all seeking. You come to it...

Let’s find out more about the Self. Creativity Self is creative. Creativity is an attitude, an inner approach you bring to any activity. You experience creative energy as passion and excitement. Enthusiasm and inspiration energize your intentions. You’re creative when...

As you let go and ground yourself in presence, the perfect action in perfect timing Self can flow.  Self is your natural state.With the obstacle of mind and it’s desires and fears out of the way, you return to the centre of the wheel, your true nature. In it,...

On the journey back to Self, let go of any form of attachment. Attachments are hooks that interfere with the flow. Get rid of hooks. There must be no getting stuck in anything in particular so that you can keep moving. The song ‘Ain't nothing gonna break my stride’...

I coined this term while I was in high school, struggling with my old LP player that would only play if helped along manually. I literally had to revolve the turn table with my hand for the first few rounds before it got going on its own. Turn it too quickly or too...

When I want to rush ahead, I am resisting what is. I get frustrated with waiting, but why do I choose to be in a state of waiting in the first place? Why am I not allowing the process? You’re living in a universe of processes, not objects or entities. You are a...

For Self to flow with the eternal moment, you have to stay in step with the moment as it happens. Don’t lag behind or get ahead of your Self. Not ahead Don’t spend time in the future in worry. Beyond planning for it, there is no point in thinking about something in...

Life is this moment you’re living right now. If you manage to stay here now, life becomes a series of present moments which you flow through - like a string of pearls you glide through your fingers. Fully present, you act spontaneously in this moment and then flow...

Now is the time to create and change. Now is the point of power. Think about it: there is never a time when your life is not this moment. Only now is here. This moment …and this… and this, becomes this eternal moment and it is all there is. Here is where life happens....

Being in the now, you are best prepared for every eventuality. Meet your challenges at full potential by taking the prime energy wasters, thinking mind and emotion, out of them. If I slow down and relax into it, I find the situation slows down too and becomes...

When we stay focussed in the now, we get more achieved with less effort. This is because now is action, not activity. Action is when the situation matters. Activity is when we are so restless within that the situation is just an excuse to be active to escape from...

Being in your head is not all bad, as long as you are in working mind and not in thinking mind. Being in working mind is what the Buddhists refer to as ‘right effort’. It is relaxed, focussed action in the moment. Now is working mind. It is your place of rest, your...

Still sceptical on why being present should be your number one priority? Let’s explore some benefits of being here now. Natural feel good Whatever you’re looking for is always right here, you’re usually elsewhere - that’s the problem. The more I am in the moment, the...

Once you’ve let go of everything in your way, the next step on the road back to Self is to immerse yourself in real life, to go deeper into the here now. The fool seeks happiness in the distance, the wise man grows it under his feet - Unknown   Mindful awareness...

Another tool on the journey back to Self is to reconnect with the third eye. On the physical level, developing the third eye, builds up the pituitary and pineal glands and has numerous health benefits. We gain light and energy through the third eye, and it helps bring...

Sending others unconditional love and strength, is a useful tool on the journey back to Self. It benefits the sender as much as the recipient. In the Reiki healing method, we say send 'universal life force energy'. I prefer this concept since sending unconditional...

Forgiving others is important because it releases you from attachment. It stops you from being sucked ever deeper into thinking mind as you stew in the wrongs done to you. Forgive to set yourself free.   When you forgive, the ego becomes undone, and you wake up...

Attract what you desire, by working with resonance: You attract what you are, not what you want. If you want great, then first be great. By vibrating at the matching level, you become a conduit for what you desire. If you believe it, can see it, can get into its...

Create a healthier reality by raising your vibrations. Your environment contains both elements that stimulate, called acidic elements and those that soothe, called alkaline elements. Try to maintain a balance between the two. Acidic colours, for instance, are red,...

American Indian shamans create a new reality through sorcery. Changing perceptions is sorcery. For this article I ask you to bear with vague terminology to be read intuitively rather than analytically. I draw heavily on analogy out of the Don Juan series of books...

This is a term I coined for turning difficult situations around for myself. Here’s how to practice inner alchemy, your superpower. Changing your inner experience of a challenging circumstance is life mastery. The question is always: 'What do I want this to be?' When...

Once you’ve managed to calm your mind, take a step back to examine your current perceptions. Perception is a choice, not a fact. Who you believe yourself to be, depends on the voices you choose to hear and the sights you choose to see. Make sure your perceptions don’t...

Don’t try to change the world. It’s incapable of changing because it’s merely an effect. The cause is your thoughts and if you change those, the effect will follow by itself. Work with source/creator and the manifestation/creation will follow suite. Change the within...

For conscious creation, work in the Now. Your mind takes you literally: If you want something in the future, since the future is never now, you’ll never get it. Wanting something, implies a present lack. Since your creation mechanism only deals with the eternal Now,...

Do you realize you create your reality all the time – whether you’re thinking about it or not? You have no choice in this. Your only choice is whether to let it happen unconsciously or do it consciously – to practice conscious creation. Do you want to be the cause of...

We begin to find Self by persistently dropping our false identifications with our memories, mind, body, emotions and thoughts. Whatever we can see is not the seer. We have a body, thoughts and emotions, but we are not our body, thoughts and emotions. We need to stop...

Dropping emotional drama is crucial because emotion is energy in motion. When we move energy, we create effect. If we move enough energy, we create matter. Emotion-charged thoughts manifest more quickly. Whatever it is we are feeling, is a perfect reflection of what...

Nothing stands in the way of our liberation. It can happen here now.  We are just more interested in other things - Nisargadatta Maharaj To use the metaphor of a spiderweb, finding Self is about extricating ourselves from the web, loosening our attachment to the...

One of the ways to drop the mind is to become aware of our thoughts - observing the thinker. We watch ourselves with the intent of understanding rather than judging. In the mirror of our minds, pictures appear and disappear. Knowing that they are entirely our own...

Dropping the labelling means that we cease putting our experiences in a box. We have to stop giving experiences shape, form and meaning because we limit them in this way. This sorting and labelling habit makes it hard to transmute what happened when the flow demands...

Dropping the thinking mind is necessary, because, contrary to its inflated opinion of itself, it is not the alpha and omega - there’s more! Sometimes we have to lose our minds in order to come to our senses -  Neale Donald Walsh Mind’s usefulness is limited because it...

We can learn a lot from plants or animals about dropping resistence. They are masters of accepting what is, of surrender to the Now, of Being. They know how to live and how to die; how not to make living and dying into a problem. What we resist, persists. What we look...

Do you remember the lamp post in C.S. Lewis’s 'The magic wardrobe'? In an old, rambling house, a group of children playing hide and seek, stumble across a wardorbe with a door at the back leading to a magical world. It is night there, but they see a lamp post close...

Next on the list of dropping limitations is dropping attachment. Whatever it is, let it go. This way, we can enter into life fully; back to no shape, form or meaning, back to no mind. Without attachment, we live in tune with things as they are, not as we imagine them...

Everything is an object of projection - even God. God has made us in his image (Genesis 1:27), but through our projections we have made God in our image. I have a strong suspicion, that God is not a separate, external being. To me it feels more like God is incarnate...

Recalling projection means understanding that whatever we see in others, exists in us, otherwise we would not see it. Let me unpack:   We have recently acquired a new 4-legged addition to our little family. His name is Zenta, a borador, with abundant energy!...

    Dropping the limitations to our potential means that we have to re-frame our experiences for ourselves: In essence by extracting the learning out of suffering and extricating ourselves from it.   Messages from the masters   Here’s what the masters...

Nurturing ourselves is not selfish, it is simply intelligent stewardship.   This means, we manage ourselves respectfully, in a way not too lax, but not dictatorial either. We create a routine of manageable tasks, so we don't feel the need to escape all the time....

You can search the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself and that person is not to be found anywhere  -  Buddha When I first read this, I really struggled with it. To accept and appreciate myself were very...

We tend to be unsure of ourselves because we rarely pay attention to ourselves, only to our experiences. Getting to know yourself, you re-claim your power. What we resist, persists, what we look at, goes away - Neale Donald WalshI love Walt Disney’s animations. I...

Go within, it’s the only way out. My house in Melville had a beautiful square courtyard, surrounded by high walls and absolutely private, which I planted up laboriously with indigenous plants - I was a purist indigenous landscaper at the time. I say laboriously...

The next step on the road back to Self is to put your external life in order. Keeping it current and simply is a good place to start. If we don’t make the time to work on creating the life we want, we’re eventually going to have to spend a LOT of time dealing with a...

Calm seas have never schooled a successful sailor. In order to grow your personal power, we need to re-position our difficulties in our minds and see them as challenges instead. Then they become, in Don Juan’s words, ‘gifts of power’. As warriors, everything is an...

Once we’ve identified our purpose, we need to focus on training the mind for personal power. We’ll need personal power to live out our purpose, otherwise it will remain just a dream. We align our thoughts to our purpose, because if we don’t take charge of programming...

I believe that once we find our way back to our Selves, we find our purpose. Our purpose therefore, initially, must be to find Self. How exactly do we do that? To start with, we need to accept that we do have choices. If accepting that you create your own life in...

Saying yes to what is, is the fastest way to enlightenment. We have the power to take charge of suffering. Our circumstances are merely conditions. It is our mind that causes the pain. Things are as they are, and we suffer because we imagined differently. Needing...

We see things not as they are, but as we are.  This works as follows: we take in information from our environment first at feeling level. We are simply aware of it without giving it shape, form or meaning. Then, if we let the mind become involved, it creates thoughts...

 Attachment   Ego is attached by nature. On the road back to Self, the obstacles are not material belongings or lifestyle as such, but our clinging to them that are. If we seek happiness there, we become attached to them and this attachment is binding. Our desire...

Staying with 'As within so without’, lets look more closely at my bold statement, 'energy affects matter’.  This seemed like a wild assumption to me until I discovered Quantum Physics. Now - I am far from mathematically gifted - I still have nightmares about failing...

In my attempts to stop my imagination from creating worst-case scenarios for me, I noticed something: When I hang out in the dark recesses of my mind, my daily life develops practical hitches. I can’t get hold of people, the copier runs out of toner at the crucial...

The word 'emotion' in latin, is 'motus' and it means 'motion'. E-motion, therefore, is energy-in-motion, a mobilizing force which propels us into action. Its origin is a thought, which arises from a perception. Thoughts create emotions. The more we identify with a...

So how do Ego and Self actually fit together? For years I tried to 'overcome’ my lower, Ego-based nature. It was Ego versus Self for me. Through study and practice of spiritual disciplines I hoped to climb the spiritual ladder. My goal was to ultimately reach and live...

We resist our present moment experience by creating time and then escaping into it.  A whole new world opened for me when I read Ken Wilber. Here are his thoughts on time: 'To move in time, is to create time. It is the mind that, itself in movement, sees everything...

The more stressed I am, the more active my emotional and reptilian brain parts become as my Ego-mind takes control. Ego-mind creates space. It is my survival mechanism and it has its place. It has extricated me out of many a needly situation with its ingenuity born of...

I find controlling my thoughts extremely difficult at times. One fearful thought leads to another and before I know it, I’m speeding down a floodlit highway of worst-case scenarios. This happens so quickly that by the time I catch myself, I am mentally very far from...

Have you ever felt that we are all playing a game here on planet earth and everyone seems to know how to play, except you?  Your moves do or don’t have the desired effect, but there’s no pattern or logic you can make out and the whole thing’s just not working for you?...